Pessimism can certainly make one’s life worse, increase bad moods and even result in depression. Before taking alternatives on how to address pessimism, let's try to establish and identify the possible psychological causes of pessimism:
1) Bad past experience
Frequent failures may
cause someone to believe that success is not possible turning her/him to be
pessimistic. Not all pessimistic people are unsuccessful but certainly
pessimism represses then from success.
2) Poor company
It can result from listening to
people who tell about their bad past experiences. Surrounded by pessimists is
contagious in the process which will certainly influence an individual to become
one after sometime even if she/he never failed before.
3) Belief system
As noticed for example, two different people fail, then one of them ends up a pessimist while the other continues
as an optimist. This takes place because of the disparity on belief system.
Pessimism can be caused by the negative limiting beliefs people obtained from
their lives. Hence, one of the best alternatives
to address pessimism is to fix belief system.
4) Religious beliefs
Individuals who have
certain religious beliefs tend to be more upbeat than those who don't have any.
Religiosity teaches significance of hope which is absent in pessimism. Pessimism
is dealt by doing anything that could re-establish hope.
5) Self-confidence
Pessimistic people do not lack
self confidence but “some” people are pessimistic because of self confidence
deficiency. Self doubts or uncertainty of potential lead to cynicism.
Dealing with pessimism and pessimistic people
1). Fix your belief system
A limiting belief is a false belief that an
individual obtains as a consequence of creating an erroneous assumption about
something in life. This could be acquired when limiting belief about her/his
ability to succeed as soon as he fails. An example of this is when one entertains unhealthy thought like: “I am a loser”, “I am a failure”, or “I can’t succeed”, which
are limiting beliefs that people collect throughout their lives.
Limiting beliefs compels to live below one’s
potential. For example, no one could lift or try to move a box that weighs 10
kilograms if he’s committed to his belief system that it weighs 100 kilograms,
even if he has the abilities.
Where do limiting beliefs come from?
Limiting belief can be acquired through a friend. For example, a friend’s assertiveness that a
particular job is tough can be influential to anyone if one remains fearful
than explore her/his abilities to conquer the task. Brought by this, potential is suppressed
because of holding back to exercise that power.
Unnoticeably, these significant others like
friends, media, relatives and the people with whom we are in contact with keep
feeding us with limiting beliefs. A
number of people live without self-confidence just because of absorbing these limiting
beliefs imposed by others.
How do limiting beliefs influence behavior?
Limiting beliefs imposes one to filter information
according to their beliefs.
For example if an individual believes that she/he
is a boring person then she/he will only remember those who were bored of
her/him but filter out all compliments received. In effect, one might stop talking to people
because of this limiting belief and that will make them think that she/he is
really boring.
2). Getting rid of limiting beliefs
a). Question the limiting beliefs
For example,
if a friend tells that the box weights 100 kilograms, ask questions like: “Did you try to lift it
yourself?”, “Who told you it weighs 100 kilograms?”, “What is the proof?”
Probing queries like these are significant
because the limiting belief might just be an opinion but not a fact. Considerably, if your friend is physically and
psychologically weak, then it is expected as a result that the box is heavy, simply because it is too heavy for him but not necessarily tedious for others.
b). Try it yourself
Try to lift the box (or a
particular undertaking for that matter) to find concrete answers and break the
limiting belief. Never easily give up if first attempt does not work out but
try to talk to people who have been able to cope with the challenge.
Limiting beliefs prevent to reach one’s potential
and succeed turning one’s life to be miserable. One of the biggest peculiarities
between the triumphant and the loser is the ability to trace and dump limiting
beliefs.
b). Recognize the certainty about triumph
No
successful person has ever made it from the first attempt. Those who succeed swiftly have been confronted
by several impediments in their lives. One of the best techniques to address
pessimism is to be realistic, embracing the reality that success never happens
before failures are stumbled upon.
C). Build self esteem
The best way to deal with pessimism
is to develop self esteem if the latter is the bottom-line, by observing these tips:
- Positive self-talk (Romans 5:3-4)
The manner of thinking self-worth has a huge
influence on one’s self-esteem. Keeping telling to yourself that “you’re no
good”, might just start to believe it even though it’s false. When noticing
frequent negative self-talk, explore some methods to challenge negative
thinking and develop confidence levels.
- Refrain from comparing yourself with others
(Hebrews 13:5)
It is tempting to measure our own worth against significant
others. So what if your friend is awesome at basketball and receives great awards?
Figure out niche/forte and that is all what you need. If everyone is great at
something, then there must be something as your strong-points.
- Exercise (Proverbs 7:22, 1 Corinthians 9:27)
Exercise facilitates to progress mood.
- Refrain from striving for perfection according
to man’s standards but concentrate of God’s. (Matthew 5:48)
It’s awesome to end up well, but remember that
perfection according to man’s tendencies is not feasible as it has no
contentment. Discover significant others’ story of coming to terms with their
sweet imperfection.
- Never stress/beat yourself up when committing
a mistake. Never be led into the error of the unprincipled and to fall from
your own stability. (2 Peter 3:17)
Everybody commits mistakes as it’s in basic human
nature. Take it as a teacher toward regeneration and move on.
- Concentrate on the things that you can amend (2 Peter 1:5-8)
It’s worthless wasting all energy thinking about
things that can’t be modified. Focus on things that are in your capacity to
control and see what can be done about those. “Do your best and let God do the
rest.”
- Do things that give you satisfaction (Sirach 29:23)
Doing the things that you enjoy is more likely to be
thinking optimistically. Schedule time for fun and relaxation on a day to day
basis.
- Rejoice on small stuff (Proverbs 7:27)
Start small and work your way up – no one can
expect any huge growth to happen overnight.
- Be supportive and thoughtful (2 Timothy 4:2)
Helping people is a great technique to boost the
moods of others and feel better about yourself especially after doing something
exceptional.
-Let yourself be surrounded by supportive
people (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
Never hang around with people who bring you down.
Find a community who make you feel good about yourself and stay away from those
who tend to trigger negative thinking.
________________________
References:
- New American Bible, http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0839/_INDEX.HTM
- M.Farouk Radwan, MSc., Dealing with pessimism. pessimism psychology, causes and treatment, http://www.2knowmyself.com/Dealing_with_pessimism/pessimism_psychology_causes_and_treatment
- Steps to improve low self-esteem, http://au.reachout.com/steps-to-improve-self-esteem
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